Wrapped up in the Details

Before baby you were organized. You were together. You had plans. And structure. You read every book on baby sleep, baby poo, baby food, breastfeeding. Everything. You knew exactly what you were going to do when baby got there.
Maybe you are in that process.
Well, Momma, let it go.
Because babies come with their own needs and schedules. You want to do everything perfectly. I know you do. You could screw them up for life if you don’t. I mean, you read in that book somewhere that if you don’t do it exactly right you will destroy your baby’s chances of every sleeping, eating, bonding ____ fill in the blank here, again. Right? But…you just can’t remember what you read.
Look, the best thing you can do for you, your baby and your family, is to relax. Let it go. Do your best to go with the flow. Your baby, especially for the first few weeks, will have ideas of their own. Their needs are constant and ever changing. What worked yesterday is failing today. Those schedules? Well, baby over slept and the whole day is off. Or maybe he’s just not hungry when you thought he should be.
If you get too spun up in the details, too panicked, too worried about following every direction a book or even a doctor told you, you will miss it. See? there it goes. Babyhood. You blink and it’s just… over. Like that. Eventually your baby’s schedule will work itself out. They will figure out that we sleep at night, not play all night. They will figure it out. You will figure out why they are crying. Or you won’t, but the problem will resolve itself, and at least you were trying, right?
They won’t cry forever. Pooping on every diaper you put on will eventually stop. I promise. Someday they will sleep for more then 2 hours. Some day. But if you are too wrapped up in the tiny details you will miss it. It goes fast. Try to be a bit more flexible than that chart on the wall allows- it’s ok to break the rules.
Follow your instincts. The clock may say baby is not hungry yet. But baby says he’s hungry so just feed him. That other book says if you nurse him to sleep he’ll never become an independent adult. But a year from now you may miss nursing baby to sleep and wish that it still worked. I know I do.
So relax.
It’s after baby now, and baby dictates what he needs. Not a book. Not all those plans you made while pregnant. Just enjoy your baby, or you will wake up one day to a teenager and wonder what happened.

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